wychwood: Anna facepalms. Geoffrey looks... fascinated (S&A - Anna facepalming)
[personal profile] wychwood
14. Greenmantle and 15. Mr Standfast - John Buchan ) I did mostly enjoy these, but I also find them intensely frustrating on all sorts of levels.

16. The Blue Castle - LM Montgomery ) I never stop loving this story.

17. Obsession in Death - JD Robb ) I'm not getting tired of this series yet, that's for sure.

18. The Gospel of Loki - Joanne Harris ) Not badly told, but also not worth bothering with unless you have never actually read any Norse mythology; if you have, you already know everything this book has to offer.

19. Rilla of Ingleside - LM Montgomery ) Thoroughly satisfying as always.

20. Life: An Unauthorised Biography - Richard Fortey ) Fortey writes in a much more personal voice than, say, Attenborough, but I like that for this kind of writing. Well worth a look.

21. The Latin New Testament - Hugh Houghton ) Interesting, but too specialist for me.
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Posted by Josh Cooper

No. 1 Star: Joel Ward, San Jose Sharks

The veteran forward scored the go-ahead goal for the Sharks and also had an assist in their 5-2 win over the Nashville Predators in Game 1 of their first-round series. Ward faked out Nashville Predators goaltender Pekka Rinne, then cut to his backhand and tucked the puck into the net for the go-ahead goal midway through the third period that made the game 2-1 in favor of San Jose. Ward’s line also drew the power play that led to the game-winner at the 15:40 mark of the third. In the regular season he’s averaged 0.44 points per-game. In the playoffs he’s averaged 0.72 points per-game. 

No. 2 Star: Radek Faksa, Dallas Stars

The rookie picked up his second game-winning goal of these playoffs with a score late in the third period to beat the St. Louis Blues 2-1 in Game 1 of the second-round. The youngster also added an assist. Faksa's line scored Dallas' two goals in the game. The Stars have won nine of their last 10 home games dating back to March 17.  

No. 3 Star: Kari Lehtonen, Dallas Stars

The netminder was steady and solid in Game 1, stopping 31 of 32 St. Louis shots on goal in the victory. Lehtonen showed no ill effects from his previous game when he allowed four goals as the Stars almost blew their Game 6 clincher against the Minnesota Wild in the first-round. In five games this postseason, Lehtonen’s had a 2.01 goal-against average and .925 save percentage. Antti Niemi has played the Stars’ other two games.

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Honorable Mention: Stars forward Antoine Roussel scored a goal. Teammate Ales Hemsky notched an assist as did defenseman John Klingberg … Blues defenseman Kevin Shattenkirk scored a goal and played 22:46 … St. Louis goaltender Brian Elliott stopped 40 of 42 shots on goal in the loss … Sharks forward Logan Couture scored two goals including the game-winner … San Jose defenseman Brent Burns notched two assists. He is the first Sharks defensemen to post three straight multi-point efforts in the postseason … Sharks goaltender Martin Jones stopped 29 of 31 shots on goal. 

Did You Know? The Dallas Stars/Minnesota North Stars franchise is 24-9 against the St. Louis Blues at home in the playoffs.  

Dishonorable Mention: St. Louis sniper Vladimir Tarasenko played 21:04 but did not pick up a point. In his last four playoff games he has one point and is a minus-1 … Nashville center Mike Fisher was a minus-3 … Preds forward Mike Ribeiro was held without a point and has just one point in eight games this postseason. 


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Posted by Josh Cooper

San Jose Sharks forward Joel Ward has a longstanding reputation as a clutch playoff performer. Late in Game 1 of his team’s second-round series against the Nashville Predators he lived up to this status. Ward took over, scoring a goal and adding an assist to help the Sharks erase a one-goal third period deficit and win 5-2.

Ward gave San Jose the go-ahead goal with a beautiful breakaway move on Predators goaltender Pekka Rinne, faking out his former Nashville teammate then going to his backhand to tuck the puck behind Rinne at the 11:49 mark of the third.

Before that momentum-changing goal, Ward got the primary assist on Tomas Hertl’s power play goal at the 2:37 mark of the third to knot the game at 1-1.

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Later in the frame, Ward’s line kept the Predators in their zone and led to a high-stick by forward Calle Jarnkrok on Joonas Donskoi. 

“I just try to embrace the moment," Ward said. "I think it’s just the atmosphere, the crowds, whether you’re home or away, it’s just fun. Everyone’s ramped up.”

On the ensuing power play Sharks forward Logan Couture deflected in a feed from Joe Pavelski for the game-winner at the 15:40 mark to put the game at 3-1 in favor of the Sharks. Predators center Ryan Johansen scored at the 18:11 mark to bring his team within one, but Couture fired an empty netter just 20 seconds later to ice the game.

The Predators took the lead after Mike Fisher scored a power play goal at the 4:33 mark of the second period, but from that point on it was all Sharks.

San Jose outshot Nashville 27-19 the final two periods and dominated puck possession after Fisher’s score. Their power play, which came into the game as one of the postseason’s best units, finished the contest 2-for-3.

“It was tough to jump into a game after a week off,” Couture said. “We were a little sluggish in the first. They were the better team there for a little while.”

San Jose signed the 35-year-old Ward to a three-year $9.825 million contract in the offseason to add some size and veteran playoff poise. Ward played three seasons with the Predators and in Nashville he started his playoff reputation with seven goals and 13 points in 12 games during the 2010-11 postseason. 

“This time of year everybody’s looking for big-heavy-hard players,” Sharks coach Peter DeBoer said. “You get to this time of year, there’s eight teams left in the NHL and 22 sitting at home, and there’s very little separating the teams talent wise. It’s usually will and strength and how hard you’re willing to play. That’s why he thrives. He’s that type of player, those are his characteristics. They don’t show up as much in the regular season as they do at this time of year.”

This postseason he has six points in six games. Game 2 is Sunday at SAP Center in San Jose. 

Quotes from Gackle Report



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Josh Cooper is an editor for Puck Daddy on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter!



Daily Happiness

Apr. 29th, 2016 11:10 pm
torachan: john from garfield wearing a party hat and the text "this is boring with hats" (this is boring with hats)
[personal profile] torachan
1. Today was one of those days at work, but despite a bunch of people calling out and a bunch of crap going on, I got out of there only an hour late.

2. Tomorrow I can sleep in!

3. Earlier this week the forecast was predicting temps in the 80s this weekend, but it's actually been in the 60s and low 70s. I hope that continues for a while.

4. We had a nice walk this evening and stopped at Pollo Loco for dinner.

5. Look at this fluffy kitten!

April Kindle for Samsung Free Book

Apr. 30th, 2016 03:48 am
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Posted by Books

Last Day: If you have a Samsung tablet or phone, you can pick one free book from the list below using the Samsung for Kindle; additional titles can also be purchased at a discount (generally $1.99), if desired. Samsung Book Deals is similar to the Kindle First program run by Amazon: the picks are from Amazon publisher imprints, but are not “new” books necessarily.

The Curse Keepers ($4.99 Kindle) by Denise G Swank

The wall between our world and that of vengeful spirits has protected humanity for more than 400 years. It’s about to come crashing down.

Ellie Lancaster has lived her whole life by the site of the mysterious Lost Colony of Roanoke, the North Carolina settlement that vanished without a trace around 1590. Only the descendants of the two men who banished the spirits of an enemy tribe from the material realm know what really happened to the colony. Ellie is one of those descendants—a Curse Keeper. Her father took pains to teach her what he knew of the curse and the responsibilities of its guardians. He taught her that if the two Curse Keepers ever meet, the curse will be lifted, the gate will open, and the raging Native American spirits will be unleashed to seek their revenge.

Despite her father’s seriousness, Ellie has always taken the legend for a harmless fairy tale. Until she meets the darkly handsome, but downright infuriating, Collin Dailey and realizes everything she was told is true. For when they meet, it’s like the air is sucked from the room. Collin’s presence is electrifying… and it’s not just attraction Ellie feels, but the inexorable pull toward her destiny. The prophecy is real, and now Ellie and Collin must battle supernatural forces and their loathing—and passion—for each other to set things right.

The Curse Keepers are all that stand between the world and its destruction.

Ghouls Rush In: Peyton Clark #1 ($3.99 Kindle) by H.P. Mallory

Do you believe in love after life?

Looking for a fresh start, Peyton Clark becomes the proud owner of a piece of New Orleans history: an Antebellum-era two-story house in the Garden District. It’s going to take time and a fat wallet to restore the fixer-upper to its former glory, but after her recent divorce, Peyton could use the distraction.

It’s not long before Peyton discovers she’s moved into the haunted home of a flirtatious paranormal prankster. She’s receiving kisses from unseen lips and caresses from a ghostly hand, and soon she begins to have vivid dreams, bringing her face-to-face with the incomparably handsome ghost of Drake Montague.

When Peyton grows closer to her general contractor, Ryan Kelly—who is as charming as he is alive—the chill in the air could only suggest Drake’s jealousy from beyond the grave. But even though she’s definitely attracted to and interested in Ryan, Peyton also can’t get Drake out of her dreams, or her heart, as she begins to uncover the frightening truth behind his death a century ago…

In Cold Blood: Beatrix Rose Thriller #1 ($3.99 Kindle) by Mark Dawson

In the vein of Jason Bourne and Jack Reacher, action-packed In Cold Blood introduces readers to Beatrix Rose, an exciting new hero with a deadly vendetta.

As the most dangerous assassin in a government kill squad, Beatrix Rose isn’t the kind of person you want to upset. Ambushed and betrayed by her team, she’s driven underground and plans revenge.

Years later, she emerges from the Hong Kong underworld with payback on her mind and a list of six people who must pay for what they did to her. With their lives.

Revised edition: This edition of In Cold Blood contains editorial revisions.

The Final Piece ($3.99 Kindle) by Maggi Myers

Life shouldn’t be about picking up the pieces. Beth Bradshaw has spent her life hiding from her tragic past. From the moment a trusted family friend steals her innocence until the moment another rescues her, she struggles to just survive. Surrounded by the comfort and protection of her extended family, Beth embarks on a journey of healing far from the horrors of her home. In her darkest moments, she meets a boy named Ryan. For one incredible summer, Ryan shows Beth what it’s like to act her own age. To feel free and let go. If only for a while. Years later, another tragedy threatens to shatter the life Beth has carefully crafted. When faced, yet again, with more pieces to pick up, Beth begins to question what her choices have cost her. Leaving her old life behind, she sets forth on a pilgrimage that will bring her back to the boy she could never forget. He wants to help her pick up the pieces of her life, but is she willing to do what it takes to become whole again? Can she trust him with a piece of herself?

If not already installed, first download the Samsung for Kindle app from the Samsung App store (I had to search for it on my phone; it’s separate from the Google Appstore). The book pick is only available from inside the app (on the menu bar on the left); once purchased from inside the app, the book is added to your regular Kindle account and can be read via any of your Kindle devices or apps.

Samsung Book Deals Info

Samsung Book Deals is a book program available exclusively within Kindle for Samsung.

With Samsung Book Deals, you can choose one of four monthly selections for free. New titles are announced at the beginning of each month.


  • To take advantage of Samsung Book Deals, you must have a Samsung account. To learn more about Samsung accounts, visit https://account.samsung.com.
  • Free downloads from Samsung Book Deals are limited to one per month per Amazon account and do not carry over from previous months.
  • Samsung Book Deals titles can be lent to other Amazon customers for a period of 14 days.
  • Free Samsung Book Deals titles can’t be gifted at purchase.

To download a title:

  1. From the Home screen of Kindle for Samsung, tap the Kindle for Samsung icon.
    Note: If you don’t have a Samsung Account, or you haven’t signed into your Samsung account, you’ll be asked to sign in to download a book. Tap Sign In, and then tap Log In to use an existing Samsung account, or Create New Account to create a new Samsung account.
  2. Tap Samsung Book Deals.
  3. Select the title to view its product detail page.
  4. Tap Buy Now with 1-Click to download the title. After you download the title, it appears on the Home screen.

Additional support for Kindle for Samsung at Amazon.

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Posted by Jen Neale

ANAHEIM, Calif. -- After Friday afternoon's press conference, Anaheim Ducks general manager Bob Murray appeared to have more questions than answers. 

Not the least of those being who will coach the team next year after he relieved Bruce Boudreau of his head coaching duties in the morning.

There will be plenty of time to address the head coaching vacancy, as Murray said, "There’s a bunch of guys out there. This is a huge choice for us. We’re going to take our time; do all our homework."

Instead, we're going to focus the other point of contention Murray brought up often when speaking with the media - the players.

Murray did not hold back when it came to addressing his team's performance in the playoffs outside of what the coaching can impact: "I’d like to know where the heck they were in Games 1 and 2. The players are going to have to answer that in the next four or five days. Where were they? They showed up in Game 7, but where was that passion? That controlled emotion? Where the heck was that? They’re going to have to be held accountable, too."

It gets better.

Murray was asked pointedly about his two best players, Ryan Getzlaf and Corey Perry's, performances in the past Games 6 and 7 over the last three years. (To describe them as 'absent' would be putting it mildly.) 

"There are definite concerns in that area," said Murray. "The core has to be held responsible. They have to be better. Maybe I haven’t been hard enough in the last few years, but they’re going to hear some different words this time."

Whatever those words are, they're probably NSFW.

'The core' Murray refers to is more or less the contracts he is going to have to live with because of the players' no-move and/or no-trade clauses. Leading the GM to quash the idea of moving Getzlaf and/or Perry right out the gate, "They’ve got no trade, no moves [contract clauses]. We have four players with that situation ... that’s one of those things I’ve said: long-term, no trade, no move [contracts] will get yourself in trouble."

Which is somewhat ironic considering he agreed to the four core contracts in question: Getzlaf, Perry, Kesler, and Kevin Bieska. (Andrew Cogliano and his limited no trade clause could be added to the list, too.)

According to Murray, he was keeping up with the market around the NHL, "It’s what we get forced into. If you follow, and to some degree that’s what happens, a couple big contracts get signed, that what you end up getting pushed into. They expect it, and we all are guilty of [providing] that, but sometimes you’re going to have to push back."

"We may have to adopt a little different philosophy on some of those things going forward, but [the players are] going to want [long-term deals with contract clauses] ... I think I’m at the point where that’s enough of some of those things."

"I can say that now it’s going to be difficult. Some of my younger players are not going to want to hear that," said Murray. "It ends up being not good for the player and the team at some point. I’m not talking about us right now, but when you look at what’s happened in other places, where players get to this point, at certain points, it doesn’t work out good for anybody."

Those young players likely include a bevy of key restricted free agents: Rickard Rakell, Hampus Lindholm, Sami Vatanen, and Frederik Andersen. All of whom played integral roles on Anaheim's second half success. Also on the RFA short list are Brandon Pirri and prospect Stefan Noesen (acquired in the Bobby Ryan trade). 

It appears as if the RFAs will be guiding the general manager's decisions this offseason: "We’ve got a sort of strategy here going about the contracts. Our RFAs ... they’re all important."

"We’re going to attempt to answer a few questions right away," said Murray. "It’s never easy because [the player are] never in a hurry to do things, but we’ve got to find out what some people are thinking as far as dollar wise. That will dictate which directions we go."

The goal appears to be to sign all the RFAs they can, but that won't be easy and could lead to more personnel turnover.

"To change some things, some people are going to get moved," said Murray, ripping the band-aid off right away. "You’re going to have to change money around, it what you’re going to do."

"My budget is my budget. As I’ve said before, I have no problem with that. Our revenues were up a little bit this year, so I get a little bit more. That’s a good thing. I don’t think the [salary] cap is going to move [much], which could be very favorable to us, except we’ve got a bunch of guys to sign. It’s going to take a lot of work and decisions on who to keep and who not to keep."

Anaheim's budget tends to be between $8-10 million under the salary cap ceiling. An incremental increase puts pressure on big spenders who might have to let go of assets the Ducks can capitalize on during free agency (for the right price). There is no indication ownership is going to open up the money bags to allow the Ducks to spend to the cap.

Instead, Murray has to look at preserving players that his organization has invested time and money into, and most importantly, see a role in the organization's future. Anyone else outside of that plan is fair game.

"The asset management of our players going forward is everything," Murray said.

"We have to prioritize as a group. It's all I’ve had on my mind since we got beat ... We haven't sat down [as a group]. I have in my mind what I think should happen, but I’ve got people that work for me that are going to want to voice their opinion."

Aside from the RFAs, the team appears to be on the search again for a top line left-winger - at a reasonable price - to play alongside Getzlaf and Perry. Murray laughed as the question was posed to him, "I answer this question every year."

He's not kidding. Ever since the trade of Bobby Ryan to Ottawa, Getzlaf and Perry have cycled through an entire team's worth of forwards attempting to find the right fit.

"So, yeah, a left hand shot, considering our team. It’s amazing. You’re always trying to find a right handed defenseman, and now I’m looking for a left hand shot. That’s kind of different."

Although, the scoring problem is not limited to the pairing of the high paid stars. "We didn’t get enough secondary scoring when we needed it," said Murray.

"We’ve basically got three second [lines] right now. I do not mind playing with three second [lines], if I could get them. For a while it looked like we had it, but it wasn’t there when it counted."

One of the key pieces in that secondary scoring puzzle is Rakell; who was mentioned frequently by Murray as one of the solutions to the scoring crisis. The soon-to-be 23-year-old center/winger and restricted free agent, was fourth on the team in scoring in the regular season with a career high 43 points (20G, 23A).

He was flying until about two weeks before the season ended when his appendix ruptured. Murray acknowledged the loss of a healthy Rakell hurt the team "big time," and the player "never got back to himself" when he returned to the lineup during the playoffs, earning only 2 points in 7 games.

Without saying it outright, Rakell is probably the No. 1 RFA target of the Ducks to get signed early.

Another area of strength appears to be the young defensive corps. "I thought our defense, for a young defense - [Josh] Manson’s injury obviously hurt us big time - did well," said Murray. For the first time since the Scott Niedermayer and Chris Pronger days, Anaheim was a strong puck possession team.

Bieksa is lumped in with the "core" group of players due to the inescapability of his contract; however, looking at the big picture, the true core of the defense is Cam Fowler. The 24-year-old is signed with the team through the 2017-18 season, and has no restrictive clauses on his contract.

Another player who appeared to join Fowler as a part of the defensive core structure was Simon Despres. He earned himself a five year, $18.5 million extension (with no clauses) set to kick in next season. However, Despres took several hits to the head during the season that caused him to miss a significant amount of time. He never returned to the form of the player that earned that contract.

Murray acknowledged as much and is concerned for his future, "... medical [examinations] are tomorrow. [Despres is] one of the ones I’m going to make sure he hangs around a bit and sees the right people. He got too many shots to the head that were - you saw some of them..." The GM shuddered and shook his head.

As stated earlier, Murray wants sign all RFAs which include two integral defensemen: 22-year-old Hampus Lindholm and 24-year-old Sami Vatanen. The thought of acquiring the rights either defenseman is enough to make other GMs salivate. 

The other looming player question for Murray comes in net.

When questioned why John Gibson was not sent down to play for the San Diego Gulls in their quest for the Calder Cup, it appeared to be a management oversight: "That was one where the trade deadline, we had to do the down and up [to ensure players could play on playoff rosters]. We made a decision, and this, right now, looks like it was another one we should have thought of."

Gibson was awarded a three year contract extension ($2.3-million AAV) set to kick in next year. He struggled in Games 1 and 2 against the Nashville Predators before getting the hook in favor of soon-to-be RFA Frederik Andersen.

The two worked well as a tandem in the Ducks post-Christmas emergence. A tandem is certainly something Murray is willing to consider, "[Assistant GM] David McNabb and I discussed that yesterday before we went in our meeting with the ownership; could we possibly work out those numbers? We’re going to see."

"The opposite side to that question is: do they want that? I mean, they’re No. 1 goalies. Any good No. 1 goalie I’ve known in my life wants the bloody net. So, do they want that? That’s an issue. But, they’re a pretty good team. It would be nice, but we’ll see."

From what Murray said earlier, it's highly doubtful he'll keep both goalies as all costs, vis a vis the Dallas Stars pricey goaltending model.

One thing Murray kept reminding reporters of is the possibility of an expansion draft next summer. He said repeatedly he doesn't know all the rules (which there aren't any official rules yet), but he has to factor that into his decisions. Reminding us also that there is no official announcement on expansion, as well.

There are a few things we know for sure ahead of player exit interviews on Saturday.

First, Murray is fine with Getzlaf keeping the captain's "C," at least, for now.

"I think he’s doing as best he can in that role. I think there’s a lot of things in that room he has to deal with," said Murray. "I think there are some different personalities in that room, and I’m not to the point of doing anything crazy in that direction."

"But when new coaches come in you have to have discussions with them about what they want to do and what they see in the room, so that discussion will happen."

Second, the GM spoke with the press at the Christmas break when the Ducks were in their major swoon, and just ripped the players for their lack of preparation for the season (i.e. out of shape in camp).

When asked if that was a concern for this upcoming year he said, "Don’t worry about that ... I already met with my strength and conditioning guy. Our guys did not prepare very well from last year to this year and the best teams always do."

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Jen Neale is an editor for Puck Daddy on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email her at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com or follow her on Twitter! Follow @MsJenNeale_PD.

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Posted by Josh Cooper

The Dallas Stars imposed their speed game on the St. Louis Blues in Game 1, outskating their opponent and peppering goaltender Brian Elliott en-route to a 2-1 victory. 

The Stars (a group that finished the regular season with the best offense in the NHL) started the game hot and continued to pour it on, outshooting the Blues 14-6 in the first period and then 17-11 in the second period. Overall Dallas outshot the Blues 42-32. 

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Blues goaltender Brian Elliott kept St. Louis steady, stopping 40 of 42 shots on goal, but ultimately couldn’t keep the powerful Dallas attack from grabbing a 1-0 series lead. Game 2 is Sunday at American Airlines Center in Dallas. 

“Well, look, they are the number one scoring team in the league for a reason," Blues coach Ken Hitchcock said. "They have great speed, but we don’t have to feed it all the time. And that is what we did too much today. Fed them way too much.”

At the 15:16 mark of the third period, Stars forward Radek Faksa converted in front of Elliott for the game-winning goal. This gave Dallas back some momentum after the Blues gained some advantage after the Blues grabbed some following their tying goal.

"It’s the first game; it’s very important for us. You want a good start," Faksa said. "We had a good back check and didn’t give up many chances to them. I think it was a great start for us.”


At the 11:32 mark of the third St. Louis defenseman Kevin Shattenkirk rifled a shot over Kari Lehtonen to tie the game at 1-1. The Blues then put together a push with opportunities by defenseman Colton Parayko and forwards Steve Ott and Scottie Upshall but all couldn’t convert.


Antoine Roussel started the scoring midway through the second period for the Stars when he put a puck past Elliott off a scrum to make it 1-0.

After ice-time squabbles in the first-round between St. Louis coach Ken Hitchcock and sniper Vladimir Tarasenko, the coach played the forward 21:04 in Game 1. Tarasenko, who scored 40 goals during the regular season, didn't xcore and fired three shots on goal. 

“Obviously he’s one guy that we’ve got the radar on.  We know when he’s out there and we want to make sure we don’t give him much ice," Stars coach Lindy Ruff said. "I thought, for the most part, we didn’t make any big mistakes that allowed any big rush plays when he was out there.  We closed fast on him inside the zone.  We went after him physically and he’s a tough, tough guy to knock off his feet but I thought we played him as hard as we could when it came to the physical front.”

The Stars were again without center Tyler Seguin, who will miss at least the first two games of this series with an Achilles injury. Seguin has only played one game this postseason because of the issue. 



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Josh Cooper is an editor for Puck Daddy on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter!

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Posted by Josh Cooper

Is someone’s trying to jinx the San Jose Sharks before their second-round playoff series against the Nashville Predators?

During warmups in advance Game 1 at SAP Center, a black cat ran off the Sharks bench, onto the ice, and then through a doorway off the ice. It’s unclear how the cat even got near the bench area to begin with. 

[Join a Yahoo Daily Fantasy Hockey contest today]

Cats interrupting sporting events actually aren’t a rare occurrence. In fact, the website The Catington Post points out the “long history” of such moments when cats are involved in sports. Though the story also notes that cats entering sporting events aren’t necessarily bad luck for the home team. 

Read here why black cats are considered bad luck.

The Sharks are considered the favorite in this series against the Predators as well as one of the most impressive playoff teams so far in 2016.


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Josh Cooper is an editor for Puck Daddy on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter!

Need Some Ma’am Malm

Apr. 30th, 2016 03:00 am
[syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed

Posted by BD

Vet | MD, USA

(I’m a technician, going over discharge instructions for a dog with an eye injury. I have a reputation for getting more and more polite the more difficult or foolish the clients become.)

Me: “So you’ll need to put these drops in his eye three times a day for the next two weeks, and make sure he wears his E-collar.”

Client: “Will it make him not want to eat?”

Me: “You can take the collar off while he’s eating, but put it right back on afterwards and don’t let him scratch the eye.”

Client: “No, the drops. Will they make him sick to his stomach?”

Me: “No, ma’am. They don’t cause nausea.”

Client: “Do they taste bad? Can I mix them with peanut butter? That’s what I do for his other pills.”

Me: “NO! Ma’am, these are EYE drops. He shouldn’t eat them. They go in his eye. It’s a topical medication.”

Client: “Ohhh. Do I put them in both eyes or just the squinty one?”

Me: “Just the squinty one, ma’am.”

Client: “Are you sure? What if his other eye gets squinty?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I’m sure. He has a scratch on his eye. Those aren’t contagious. I promise.”

Client: “Well, I’ll put them in both eyes anyway, just in case.”

Me: *gives up* “Sure, ma’am. Just make sure to keep up with the drops in the affected eye for the full two weeks. If you run out early just come in and we’ll get you some more.”

(The client leaves, and the practice manager comes out from behind the desk where she’d been sitting trying not to laugh.)

Manager: “I bet [Veterinarian] five bucks she would be a seven Ma’am-er, at least!”

The post Need Some Ma’am Malm appeared first on Funny & Stupid Customer Stories - Not Always Right.

edenfalling: colored line-art drawing of a three-scoop ice cream sundae (ice cream sundae)
[personal profile] edenfalling
Okay so.

I am stuck like a stuck thing on "Guardian" ch. 17 scene 3 (not because I don't know what comes next; I just... can't make the words happen). I can't manage to focus on "The Courting Dance" instead (because guilt? tone mismatch? who even knows; brains are weird), and when I try to avoid the issue and write something completely unrelated, I just kind of blank out, like those two fics are gnawing away all the processing power that would normally go to the part of my brain that comes up with new ideas and/or picks an old idea and says 'your time in the sun has come, small plotbunny!'

I think you see where I am going with this, yes? Yes. It is once again mini-ficlet prompt meme time, because when I can't jumpstart my own creativity, I beg other people to do it for me. (Because it works. Why? Who knows. See above in re: brains being weird.)

The caveat this time is that I want to write fluff!

Here is a link to my open Cotton Candy Bingo card, which still has sixteen unfilled squares. For those who prefer lists to graphics, the open prompts are: picnic, soft, sleepwalking/sleeptalking, tradition, the little things, names/naming, WILD CARD, eyes, favorite, adventure/quest, color, open, cute, cuddle, free, sunrise/sunset.

Leave a comment with one to four characters, a prompt word from the list, and a scenario, and I will write you a ficlet of at least 500 words. Scenarios must be fluffy!

(...Look, I know my definition of fluff can get pretty idiosyncratic. But work with me here, okay? If the characters end the ficlet on a happy note, we're good.)

Anyway, if you have ever wanted a sequel to one of my oneshots, or another installment in any of my series/AUs, this is your chance to make me write it for you. :)

[Obligatory small print: Crossover prompts are fine! I reserve the right to reject fandoms I am not familiar with and produce ambiguous gen when attempting to write shipfic. Also, if someone else has previously claimed your requested prompt word, I will tell you so and offer you a chance to make a new prompt.]
[syndicated profile] lois_mcmaster_bujold_feed
..made really extraordinarily accessible.

So, I've been continuing to browse my local library's collection of The Great Courses, which despite their daunting header are at about the level of a freshman intro course crossed with a PBS special. (Except taught by actual professors who speak English as their native language, instead of a grad student TA just off the plane from Farfaraway, like my freshman courses back in the Dark Ages at Big State U.)

I have become a fan of a particularly engaging and effective presenter, Dr. Stephen Ressler, who has done a number of courses for the company, including Understanding the World's Greatest Structures: Science and Innovation from Antiquity to Modernity, Understanding Greek and Roman technology: From Catapult to the Pantheon and this week, Everyday Engineering: Understanding the Marvels of Daily Life.

He's sort of like a Mr. Wizard for grownups. You definitely want to track down the DVDs, because the models and vids he demonstrates are a tremendous boost to comprehension. I'd rec the first two especially for writers trying to understand pre-industrial technologies through history, and the latter to everyone. (Well, I'd rec them all to everyone, because why should writers keep all the fun to themselves?) But the Everyday Engineering one is proving just full of things I wish I'd known earlier. Which, since it's a 2015 production, wouldn't have been possible, but chalk it up among the many rewards of my surviving this long.

Sampling the courses from the library randomly as my interest takes me, I can see the sophistication of the presentations grow from the early ones from the late 90s, which basically stuck a professor behind a podium and let the camera run while s/he geeked out about his or her favorite subject as fast as s/he could, to the most recent efforts, which use far more pictures, vid clips, computer graphics, and so on.

Why doesn't Netflix have these...?

Ta, L.

posted by Lois McMaster Bujold on April, 29


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