bear

The two Death Cab For Cutie/The Postal Service concerts I treated myself to in October were really a belated present to my early-mid-20s self.

( some backstory, 2002-2004 )

So when I heard that The Postal Service was pulling it together for one more reunion tour, and that Death Cab for Cutie would be their costar on the double bill? Of course I was going to try for tickets. (You announce this on my birthday week? Double duh!)

( neuroses about arena shows )

And oh, my heart.

Sitting six rows up in the Greek Theatre in shirtsleeves as the fog rolled into the Berkeley Hills and settled on my arms, listening to Ben Gibbard croon to me for two hours about love and long distance and loss, was the best possible present I could have given February 2003 me, however belated. (Sitting a little further back at the Hollywood Bowl for an encore just over a week later, with bonus Iron & Wine? Cherry on top.)

( The Beths: love is learned over time )

( Death Cab for Cutie: there'd be no distance that could hold us back // I need you so much closer )

( The Postal Service: I am a visitor here, I am not permanent // everything will change )

( Iron & Wine: god give us love in the time that we have // for all the love you've left behind you can have mine )

The one thing I do feel was a real missed opportunity - they had Sam Beam there. How do you *not* figure out a way for Sam *and* Ben *and* Jenny to do a three-part harmony version of the acoustic version of Such Great Heights in the encore, when you even jokingly introduce it as "Alright, this next song is an Iron & Wine cover." I already knew how I'd harmonize it, how I'd buff up Jenny's part and add in more close harmonies from Sam. Somebody pass me a copy of Finale and Ben Gibbard's email, please :P

(And as I was heading back to the Metro after the concert with the other transit-takers, close to 11 pm on a Tuesday night, I had the most LA moment. Walking down Hollywood Boulevard, gliding past one person filming another person peeing on Ryan Reynolds' star, while a third person was art directing the shot. OH HOLLYWOOD, this is why you wear sunglasses at night, got it.)

But oh, 2003 self. I hope you enjoyed this present. Take heart. Go see more shows. Keep singing. (The choir you'll join that fall will do wonders for your soul.) Continue to fall in love as quickly and fiercely as you always do. Maintain that openness, that willingness to be vulnerable, to take risks. You have so much good coming your way. You were, and are, and will be loved.

... my Swedish Chef icon was based on a US stamp back when letter stamps cost $0.37, and this weekend they went up to $0.55, so hi, I'm old, how are you.

At some point, my Instagram crossposts failed, which was basically how I felt like being on the internet for a long while - pictures as a signal flare of "I'm still alive, here's a good thing I want to remember."

In the interim couple of years, I've:

* spent most holidays in LA soaking up warmth and fruit and Pacific Ocean zen to fortify myself through yet another New England winter (starting to get real tired of the latter part of that cycle); Park family gatherings annually uniting all of us scattered kids to hang out with each other and eat a lot of good Korean food. Making sure to get out to Santa Monica at least one Wednesday per trip for the farmers' market and dipping my toes in my beloved Pacific, frigid to everyone else but merely invigorating to me; that's what twenty-odd New England winters'll do for ya, I guess! Supplementing with my other favorite LA farmers market (the Sunday Hollywood one, though you do have to dodge the creepy slant-rhymes-with-gynecologists).

* ( milestone birth month: spent chasing the sun in California and Hawaii, sheer delight )

* managed to fly red-eyes in both directions for a Las Vegas work trip (again with that New England winter crap)

* went to Nashville for the first time (and recognized a LOT of LA and NYC brands setting up shop). They're in for iiinteresting times there; I used public transit for most of my getting around and had conversations about density and sudden growth and just how was everyone supposed to be getting around based on the population increasing by X but the roads only having so far to widen, which meant I got to evangelize about induced demand and transit to some very bemused locals).

* popped down to NYC on various day trips

* failed to Kondo my stuff except in dribs and drabs

* spent pretty much every other scrap of free time at the farmers' markets or the bookstores.

So, you know, me being me.

I still don't know if I have much to talk about on an ongoing basis, but it's nice to remember that this place exists. Catch up with people. Hello.

When your shingo pear is the size of a small melon.

Yes, that is cotton candy atop our soft serve. (Among other toppings, including pop rocks.) #latergram